Skip to main content
Search
Search
The New Yorker

Humor & Cartoons

Shouts & Murmurs

Recommendations from the Guy Who Works at Your Local Dispensary

Turpentine Gelato, Fiscal Daydream, and . . . what was the question again?
Shouts & Murmurs

Ideas for the New York City Officials Implementing Rat Birth Control

Encourage male rats to recount the plots of “Dune” and “Dune: Part Two” on first dates.
Shouts & Murmurs

How I Use the Internet, According to Nineties Action Movies

I pull up a digitized photo on the screen. Leaning in, I drag a bright-green box around a detail in the image, type rapidly for a full fifteen seconds, and then softly say, “Enhance.”
Shouts & Murmurs

Stories from the Trump Bible

And Jesus said to Pontius Pilate, “This trial is very unfair. You are a corrupt judge, and your wife is a very nasty woman.”
Sketchbook

Overheard in New York: Waiting for the Eclipse at the Brooklyn Botanic Garden

“She’s a flat-earther.”
We provide a cartoon, you provide a caption. Enter this week’s contest.

Daily Cartoons

1/15

“I’m denying your motion to delay because it’s Passover and Earth Day and your client doesn’t like Mondays.”
Cartoon by Peter Kuper
Peruse a gallery ofcartoons from the issue »

Comics

Blitt’s Kvetchbook

Trump on Trial: The Defense Rests

But is quickly roused awake!
Sketchbook

A Millionth-Anniversary Surprise

When one has been married forever, one sometimes feels that there is nothing new one will ever discover about one’s person, however . . .
Sketchpad

Signs of the New Season

Girl Scout cookie surplus, skimpy-clothes anxiety? It must be spring!
Shouts & Murmurs

Beyond Country: Forthcoming Beyoncé Albums in Surprising Genres

A German synth-pop record: Notable tracks include “If I Were Ein Boy,” “All the Single Fräulein,” and “Hälo.”

Why Is Tonight Different?

Shouts & Murmurs

Four Questions—Extended Version

Why on this night does the mother-in-law say that the brisket her son’s wife cooked is dry when it is fine?
Shouts & Murmurs

The Other Children of Passover

The child who found the afikomen before the time to look for it officially began, the influencer child, and the child who, if he could please sit down, we could get started.
Shouts & Murmurs

A Special Seder

I must recount the day, in 1864, when my parents invited President Lincoln to our home for Passover.
Shouts & Murmurs

A Few More Questions for This Seder

Why is it that, on this night, we have four cups of wine, when I feel like I need so many more?

More Humor

Shouts & Murmurs

U.F.C. Fighter on How to Protect Yourself from Being Swept Off Your Feet

The Eye Gouge: The eye gouge prevents love at first sight by ending their sight. This is why the Three Stooges never got laid.
Shouts & Murmurs

I Can’t Stop Calling the National Guard

I called the National Guard when I overbaked my brownies and my smoke alarm went off; I called the National Guard when I underbaked my brownies and I was worried they might make me sick.
Shouts & Murmurs

Old-Fashioned Know-How

Kids today! You ever fought a forest fire that you yourself started? You ever had thirteen kids by seventeen different women?
Shouts & Murmurs

Depressing! You Cumulatively Spend Three Days a Year Playing a Game You Enjoy

Just think about how many better ways you could be spending that time—like by doing something you hate.
Shouts & Murmurs

What You’ve Been Missing in My Instagram’s “My Close Friends”

The photo of the weird spill on my jeans is exclusively for my Instagram close friends, sorry.
Shouts & Murmurs

Our Environmental Pledge

Because we are so dedicated to the future of this planet, our C-suite will no longer use the company’s private jets to drag-race in the sky.
Blitt’s Kvetchbook

A Whole New Ballgame

Opening Day has arrived, and all bets are off.
Shouts & Murmurs

Cillian Murphy’s Bedtime Routine

5 P.M.: Call ’round to the pub and dine on a hearty meal of potatoes, bangers, and the knowledge that you are Christopher Nolan’s favorite.
Shouts & Murmurs

“The Real Housewives of Roku City”

These ladies bring tons of drama and are no strangers to a TV screen.
Shouts & Murmurs

Signs You Should Give Up on a Book

You’re using the book to squash bugs; you’re waiting for the book to initiate physical contact; you can’t stop thinking about Gary Oldman movies.