Donald Trump Reviews the Best Picture Oscar Nominees

PHOTOGRAPH BY DALE ROBINETTE  SUMMIT RELEASING  EVERETT
PHOTOGRAPH BY DALE ROBINETTE / SUMMIT RELEASING / EVERETT

“Manchester by the Sea”
A loser goes back to his home town, in Pocahontas Warren’s Massachusetts, after burning down his house. A real dump! Sad!

“Arrival”
Aliens come to America illegally and a nasty woman completely misses her chance to wipe them out. Sad!

“La La Land”
Two Hollywood liberal élites fail miserably. Ryan (Long Face) Gosling isn’t very attractive. Should have just walked up to Emma Stone and started kissing her. Sad!

“Fences”
All talk, no action. Sad!

“Lion”
Dev Patel (Bad dude? Possibly!) goes back to his country and doesn’t stay there. Nicole Kidman, once a ten, wears a horrible wig. Sad!

“Hidden Figures”
This film is the story of some African-Americans who were able to escape the burning inner cities and work for totally overfunded NASA. FAKE NEWS! Sad!

“Hacksaw Ridge”
Mel Gibson is a tremendous talent and an even better husband! All the haters and losers need to get OVER the stuff he said on tape. Mel never claimed he’s a perfect person! Move on! Sad!

“Hell or High Water”
Two real Americans go after the banks while exercising their Second Amendment rights. Things go horribly wrong when they forget that #BlueLivesMatter. Sad!

“Moonlight”
A total disaster.